Trapped...

So it starts just like any other good thing would: Late night convos, early morning sweet nothing texts, that anticipation of seeing em the next time.... And you know that develops into a serious talking stage right before the "boyfriend/Girlfriend" stage, cause you know you gotta sift out all of the old chicks you was still "kickin" it with. So you now you commit after you've quit all your bullshitting cause you ready to show her that its all about her what you wanna build. So now its a full pledge relationship and you showing your real colors: Favorite snack and drinks to her job, Cooking, romantic dates, the greatest epic passionate sex, giving up access codes because you have nothing to hide, Drifting away from yo boys, everything you tried to portray that you wouldn't. And more and more everyday you begin to feel and notice that your love isn't the same as hers, you notice that her kisses don't match your passion, her hugs don't feel warm, her eyes have no emotion, and you tough so it's easy to put it in the back of the closet cause you know that you don't have to see because its covered up by a lot of things.. But now she's doing things out of character like putting her phone in her pocket and checking it when you know it didn't ring, taking showers before she comes to see you when she gets off work, noticeable things that make you wonder but just feeling that she might still love you makes you put on some blinders and pretend that you don't notice..... So now she picks retarded arguments and comes up ridiculous reasons to not come see you or meet you anywhere, but you don't trip cause just feeling that she might still love you, you make yourself believe what she says... So now its over and you find out that she was letting a nigga undermine your relationship and entertaining him in ways that are fightable offenses.. But you don't trip cause you know that you still have something for her and you don't wanna do anything to harsh to mess that up just cause you feel that she might still love you... Trapped in your own smokescreen of "love" makes you do things that you wouldn't do if you were looking at yourself do them.. It hurts like hell to see what you want taken away or given away or even what you want choosing someone else... So how do you get out of that trap...?? And how do you not act calast to what might happen in the future..? How do you go back to all the things you used to do without fear of disappointment...? How do you not be an asshole when that's what the girls you want are attracted to..?? He's trapped in a current of mixed emotions.... What would you do..??